Aren’t great relationships supposed to just magically happen?
Well – in fairy tales they do. In real life, they require “keeping a finger on the pulse” and making needed adjustments daily or weekly. The best relationships understand this and when they sense that the relationship’s energy is trending “down”, the correction is starting to me made.
There’s a little scenario that every relationship goes through. That scenario will occur multiple times in its life-span, and sometimes even multiple times in a week. Hopefully, not in a day – as that could be too much.
Over time, all good relationships go through ups and downs. There are periods where the relationship feels more effortless and then periods where resistance is felt, and more intention is required.
A perfect relationship just doesn’t exist. The question is what do you do when things get hard? Maybe even fall out of love?
Some people naturally draw back and it can be hard to help them, because they turn inward. If this happens, we can start to take that personally, as if they are drawing back from us. Actually, it’s just their way of dealing with things. They deal with things through their own process, and that feels foreign to you.
You just choose your own vibe. You accept that this is a stage of your relationship, reflecting what your partner is going through and not personal to you. You need to focus on yourself, your feelings and get to really know yourself. Love yourself in order to be able to love others.
As a couple, you must both be committed to making the relationship work. That means that, individually, you must commit to work on yourself.
It takes time. It takes work. And it’s entirely worth the effort. Because, at the end of the day, functional relationships teach you how to become a better person—and that’s something you retain whether or not your relationship lasts a lifetime.